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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/29340012">you're what I do best, and we're making this mess together</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/lifewasradical/pseuds/lifewasradical'>lifewasradical</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>5 Seconds of Summer (Band)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Anxiety, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Its implied, Kinda?, Love Confessions, M/M, Sleepy Cuddles, how the hell do i even tag this</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2021-02-10</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2021-02-10</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-13 12:29:24</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>2,052</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/29340012</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/lifewasradical/pseuds/lifewasradical</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>“What the fuck, Michael” Luke says once he’s pulled the window open, unsure if Michael will even be able to hear him. He’s never tested the range of sound projection needed to talk to someone from his bedroom window to the backyard. </p><p>“Hey!” Michael grins, teeth gleaming in the moonlight. He stands there, not moving or making any indications of why he’s in Luke’s backyard.</p><p>Or, Michael shows up at Luke's house in the middle of the night.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Michael Clifford/Luke Hemmings</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>11</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>40</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>you're what I do best, and we're making this mess together</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>a prompt fic for my lovely <a href="https://wheniminouterspace.tumblr.com">Shal</a> "rise and shine, mother fucker". this uh... took a turn that I didn't anticipate. It's easily one of my favorite things I've written recently with the mix of fun and emotions but. yeah, see for yourself. shal, I love you so much and I hope you enjoy this 💜</p><p>title from human nature by Mali Koa</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Luke wakes up to a soft tapping. It’s strange, coming out of a dream and acknowledging the world around him. He blinks into the darkness, getting reacclimated to owning his body and existing in the conscious world. He takes mental inventory, noticing that it’s still dark out, the fan is still going, Petunia is still laying next to him sleeping soundly.</p><p>So what woke him up?</p><p>Luke reaches over and takes his phone off his nightstand, squinting uselessly at the blue light of his screen. He scrolls through the notifications on his screen, catching sight of 21 unread messages from Michael.</p><p><strong>Michael (2:31am):</strong><br/><em>You up?</em><br/><em>Of course you’re not</em><br/><em>You should be</em><br/><em>I’m gonna wake you up</em><br/><em>Luke come onnnnn</em><br/><em>I know you’re a heavy sleeper but please</em><br/><em>Luke</em><br/><em>If I call you will you answer?</em><br/><strong>Michael (2:36am):</strong><br/><em>Useless, I swear</em><br/><em>Well I’m coming over</em><br/><em>So you better wake up</em><br/><strong>Michael (2:58am):</strong><br/><em>Hey</em><br/><em>Hey Luke</em><br/><em>Did you wake up yet?</em><br/><em>Rise and shine, mother fucker</em><br/><strong>Michael (3:02am)</strong>:<br/><em>Hm you’re not waking up</em><br/><em>Maybe I didn’t think this through</em><br/><em>I’m not gonna go to your door and have your neighbors think I’m trying to break in</em><br/><em>Okay, this better wake you up, I swear to fuck you’re the heaviest sleeper I’ve ever met.</em></p><p>
  <strong>Luke (3:07am):</strong>
  <br/>
  <em>What</em>
</p><p>
  <b>Michael (3:08am):</b>
  <br/>
  <em>Thank fucking god, open your window</em>
</p><p>Luke stares blankly at the screen, trying to wrap his head properly around what Michael’s talking about. He carefully leans over the edge of the bed, intentionally missing Petunia, and pulls back the curtain.</p><p>There, on the grass below his window, is Michael. He’s clad in a dark hoodie and a backwards snapback, waving up at Luke as if nothing is wrong here. As if it’s usual for Michael to be standing outside of Luke’s house at three in the morning on a Tuesday night.</p><p>“What the fuck, Michael” Luke says once he’s pulled the window open, unsure if Michael will even be able to hear him. He’s never tested the range of sound projection needed to talk to someone from his bedroom window to the backyard.</p><p>“Hey!” Michael grins, teeth gleaming in the moonlight. He stands there, not moving or making any indications of why he’s in Luke’s backyard. It’s slightly unnerving, given the vague urgency of Michael’s texts coupled with him coming over in the dead of night regardless of whether or not Luke was awake.</p><p>“What are you doing?” Luke asks, shifting forwards more to sit more comfortably.</p><p>“Throwing rocks at your window?” Michael replies, tossing a rock up in the air a bit.</p><p>“At midnight?”</p><p>“Well, it’s actually three am, so. Nice try though!”</p><p>There’s a pause. “No really, why are you here?” Luke asks.</p><p>Michael shrugs. It’s a hair too nonchalant, like he’s forcing his shoulders to move despite the fact that he doesn’t want to. He still doesn’t answer, just kicks at the grass a little bit.</p><p>Luke sighs, feeling the breeze on his face, “Well come in already, you have a key for a reason.”</p><p>“I didn’t want to just come in uninvited and scare the shit out of you,” Michael replies.</p><p>“As if waking up to more than twenty texts from you wasn’t terrifying already.”</p><p>Michael has the decency to look a little guilty as he waves at Luke, disappearing from view. Luke sits back on the bed, petting Petunia as he listens for Michael unlocking the front door. There’s a moment of random noises, likely Michael taking off his shoes and jacket. Petunia grumbles, getting prepared to defend her house from the intruder until Luke settles her.</p><p>“It’s just Mike, you love Michael,” Luke coos, paying attention to the footsteps pacing around downstairs. Michael finally makes his way upstairs, treading lightly. Luke waits, sitting up against his headboard in anticipation.</p><p>Michael doesn’t just show up in the middle of the night for nothing. It’s been years since he’s come crawling to Luke for reassurance or support. Luke’s been the more broken one as of late, needing the extra guidance from those around him. The idea of Michael needing Luke enough to come over like this warms Luke’s heart, but also has a chill settling in his spine in worry of what’s to come.</p><p>Michael finally comes into the bedroom, holding a water bottle in his hand. He still holds that same sheepish expression, like he’s ashamed of coming here and waking Luke up. But if Luke is being honest, the second that he saw the messages from Michael, he was wide awake and ready to help in any way he could.</p><p>“Hey,” he says, sitting down on the edge of the bed. He pats Petunia’s head lightly, leaning down to kiss the bridge of her nose. She snorts happily, pressing up into Michael’s hand.</p><p>“Hi,” Luke replies, shifting in bed a little. He wants to say more, to immediately jump into asking why Michael is here and what he can do to fix the hurt, but he also wants to respect Michael’s boundaries. Trying to pull information out of him unwillingly will just result in Michael clamming up and refusing to speak. Luke knows this, proceeding with caution to avoid spooking him.</p><p>“I’m sorry.”</p><p>Luke waits. Michael says nothing.</p><p>“Why are you sorry?”</p><p>Michael sighs, shrugging his shoulders. “I’m sorry for waking you up? For coming here in the middle of the night? For ruining your sleep?” he rattles off, counting on his fingers as he does.</p><p>“Please don’t, you know you can always come to me if you need something,” Luke says. Michael fists the duvet in his hands, seeking out something to ground him in the moment. He looks impossibly small, hunched in on himself to protect his head or heart, Luke isn’t sure.</p><p>“Wanna cuddle?” Luke offers after a beat of silence. He doesn’t wait for Michael’s answer, instead just pulls back the blanket to make room. Michael turns, scanning Luke’s face for a minute before wordlessly crawling into the covers. He immediately turns and presses himself against Luke at every place possible, leg hitched up over Luke’s thigh, head on his chest, arm tight around his torso.</p><p>Luke feels him sigh, burying his head in the soft material of Luke’s sweatshirt. He winds an arm around Michael’s back, laying his hand out palm down on his spine, tracing over his spine. They don’t say anything, just sitting in careful silence.</p><p>“My brain feels soupy,” Michael finally says into Luke’s chest. Luke hears him clearly in the quiet, but he doesn’t reply, waiting for Michael to open up a little more.</p><p>“There’s too much there. I try to focus on one thought at a time and suddenly I’m thinking about a time in middle school when I tripped walking up the stairs. And then it flits to thinking if I fed the dogs dinner or not. Then I’m thinking about how much I miss my mom. The future of the band. The unread emails in my inbox. My last ex, where are they now? How much laundry do I have to do? Everything is just… soupy.”</p><p>Luke withholds the urge to laugh at the explanation, Michael’s way of describing his emotions always has been more unique than others. “I’m sorry you feel that way. Did something happen that started it?” Luke says, settling his other arm around Michael’s outstretched arm, fingers running through his hair lightly.</p><p>“Was just thinking.”</p><p>“About?” Luke pries, knowing that from Michael’s tone of voice, he has something more to say about the situation.</p><p>There’s a tense pause. “You.”</p><p>Luke breathes out through his nose. “What about me?” It comes out as a whisper, moving into uncharted territory. Michael’s mental spiral being caused by Luke isn’t what Luke wanted to hear, guilt seeping into his frown. He never wants to cause Michael any harm, wanting nothing but the best for him at every moment.</p><p>Michael sighs. His hand tightens in Luke’s hoodie and he presses himself further into Luke’s body. “I love you, you know?” Michael says conversationally, avoiding Luke’s question. He tilts his head up a little, moving to look at Luke properly from his space on his chest.</p><p>For a second, Luke thinks about how awful he must look from the angle Michael is at, all double chinned and oily skinned and scruffy. But when he locks eyes with Michael, the love and adoration in his eyes outweighs any of the feelings that Luke may be harboring in his brain. Michael looks at him like he's the only person in the universe, the only one that matters. The only time Luke thinks he’s seen Michael look like this was the first time they played a sold out arena show, completely awestruck and grateful for their situation.</p><p>“I love you too,” Luke confirms, squeezing Michael a little tighter. Michael closes his eyes, skin wrinkling at the force of it.</p><p>Michael huffs, “No Luke, like. I love you. It’s literally always on my mind. The amount of times I’ve spiralled down into shit thoughts because I started thinking about you? Too many. It sucks because I don’t want to think of you, like, I don’t want you to be on my mind all the time because it sucks that I feel this way about someone who doesn’t feel the same about me, but I also can’t hold it in anymore, you know? I try so hard to keep my own feelings to myself and be the best band mate I can be but it’s so fucking hard to hold it all in when all I want to do is scream and shout and just fucking… get it all out of my brain.”</p><p>There’s a moment of tense silence where Luke’s heart hammers in his chest. There’s no way that Michael can’t feel it beating, pressing against his rib cage eagerly. It’s a frightening declaration but at the same time, Luke feels strangely… at peace?</p><p>That’s the only way he can logically describe the feeling of content and calm that echoes through his bones, holding Michael close to him after hearing that grand statement. Luke stares at the swirling ceiling, focusing in on the pattern in the darkness. He thinks that he might understand what Michael means when he says his brain is soup, all alphabet letters tumbling together trying to create a response.</p><p>“I’m sorry,” Michael says again, not moving his head from Luke’s chest.</p><p>“Why?” Luke whispers, not trusting anything else to come out yet.</p><p>“For always fucking things up. Pretend I didn’t say it, this is a dream.”</p><p>Luke laughs, unable to hold it in. “Michael, I love you,” he replies, sure of his response. He needs to think through his emotions and figure out what he wants to do with this information, but he knows he loves Michael in every iteration of the word.</p><p>Michael tenses before opening his eyes. There’s a slightly terrified look in them, yet they still shine earnestly, “Don’t say it just because I did. That’s not -- I’m not guilting you into saying something, I just want to get it out of my brain because I can’t fixate on that thought anymore.”</p><p>Luke shakes his head, maintaining the gaze, “I’m not. I’m not lying to you. I don’t know what to do about this or what it means for us or how to move forward, but I’m not lying when I say I love you with my whole heart.”</p><p>“It’s always been different for us, hasn’t it,” Michael says, almost like a secret. It’s said into Luke’s hoodie like he doesn’t want it to be heard, again, a nervous statement.</p><p>“It has, because there is no me without you,” Luke replies, cringing at how sappy he sounds but meaning every word. He’s never been able to be fake around Michael, too similar and able to see through each other effortlessly.</p><p>Neither of them say anything for a moment, sitting in the darkness at now almost four in the morning. “We’ll figure it out, together,” Luke confirms, bending his head to press a kiss to Michael’s soft hair.</p><p>Michael doesn’t reply, but his hold on Luke grows tighter and Luke thinks that maybe that’s all he needs, the confirmation that Michael is here and with him. It feels like a promise.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Talk to me on Tumblr <a href="https://lifewasradical.tumblr.com">lifewasradical</a> 💜</p></blockquote></div></div>
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